VII: Christmas Disappointments
With such high hopes and expectations, it's only natural that the holidays are often marked by let-downs, disappointment, and heartbreak. Leading up to the arrival of my family and the excitement of the impending holidays, I'm going to bring it down a notch for the next few blog entries and focus on the darker side of the holidays.
When you're a kid, you're pretty specific about what gifts you want for Christmas. Usually, you have put a lot of work into your list, double checking the catalogs and aisles of your favorite stores making sure you've selected only the most desirable of toys and presents. I would carefully dole out my wishlist, making sure to assign the low-price items to those who would be giving me gifts for the school exchange or the 4-H secret santa, reserving the moderately priced ones for close friends, siblings, and cousins, and of course requesting the finest ones from my parents and ol' St. Nick. I thought making things simple and direct for everyone would give me the best shot at yielding the greatest number of "keeper" gifts. Of course, this did not always turn out the way I imagined.
The let-down that I feel the worst about even to this day, although for a completely different reason than I had at the time, is the infamous year of the rock tumbler. I may have blogged about this, or any of the following gifts, before so forgive me if you've already heard this. One year, when I was hopefully much younger than 10 or so, I found a very cute red plastic rock tumbler in the JC Penney's catalog. I didn't know anything about polishing rocks, and I had never really had an interest in rock collecting before, but the photo of the tumbler was so cute and the kids in the catalog looked enraptured by the thing. So I put it at the top of my list: this is What I Wanted! On Christmas morning that year, I ran out to the tree, ready to collect my compact, shiny red rock polisher, only to find a huge monstrosity under the decorated branches. There was some sort of humongous, industrial machine under the tree that looked like a cross between a war cannon and a car engine. What in the heck was that I wondered? Well, shortly I was to receive the answer: it was my rock tumbler! Apparently, many other children were just as fascinated by the trendy device they had seen in the pages of the winter catalog, and JC Penney's had sold out of them before my parents had a chance to order mine! My father knew I had my heart set on it, so he somehow managed to drive all over western Kansas to find a rock polisher and the only one available was an actual, professional model that some guy made himself. This was for heavy duty, serious rock polishing! The guy who made it sold my dad a bunch of packets of the powder that you were supposed to put in the tumbler to polish the rocks down. Well, this was NOT What I Wanted and I threw a huge temper tantrum to demonstrate my disappointment. I live life with few regrets, but that moment is one of the few. My dad made such an effort to make my Christmas perfect that year, spending way more time and money on something that not only did I not appreciate, but openly scorned! I wish I had just been able to man up and pretend that I liked it, at the very least, but what I really wish is that I could have seen how much my father tried to deliver the perfect gift and I would have recognized that it was actually much better than the silly toy I had asked for. Instead, the rock polisher was doomed to sit in a corner of my bedroom, never to be used for it's intended purpose.
Another time I was horribly rude to someone for buying me a gift other than the one I wanted was in junior high when my girlfriend Maria and I exchanged presents. As usual, I had been extremely specific: I wanted "This Time: The First Four Years" by the Culture Club on vinyl. It had all their hits and a song I'd never heard before! I don't even remember what I bought her, but when she handed me my gift, a 12"x12" flat square all wrapped up, I was so happy; only to rip open the package and discover... "Out of Our Hands" by Pablo Cruise. Who the? What the? Not only was it the wrong record, it was something I'd never even HEARD of! What was with the stupid kid-like handprints all over it? Did she add those herself, I wondered? Oh, I was so mad. Visible shaken, Maria apologized and had a very long story of what exactly happened, but in the end it came down to the fact that this record was only $1, and that was really all she could afford. She wanted to get me the right record, but it was too much money, and she thought maybe as long as she got me a record it would at least be partially acceptable. I hope I wasn't too hard on her. But really, when your junior high boyfriend demands a Culture Club album for Christmas, maybe you suspect that there are larger issues looming...
Lastly, here's one that I don't really remember at all other than from the home video which unfortunately survives to this day. I wasn't disappointed with the actual gift itself, because it had been exactly what I asked for: The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse (I looked for a photo online but couldn't find one). It was a vinyl tent with a frame made out of plastic poles. When assembled, it looked like a cute little house for kids to play in. I ended up loving the present and had it set up in my room for quite awhile. But, when I first took it out of the packaging, I was very distraught and exclaimed, "I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GONNA BE ALL WINKLED!" (Wrinkled) It's a hilarious video of a bratty little kid upset that things weren't the perfect way he had imagined them. Later in the video, I steal my sister's stuffed My Little Pony to play with as my own!
Have you ever gotten a rotten gift? Given a clunker to a loved one? Tell me your stories in the comments section!
When you're a kid, you're pretty specific about what gifts you want for Christmas. Usually, you have put a lot of work into your list, double checking the catalogs and aisles of your favorite stores making sure you've selected only the most desirable of toys and presents. I would carefully dole out my wishlist, making sure to assign the low-price items to those who would be giving me gifts for the school exchange or the 4-H secret santa, reserving the moderately priced ones for close friends, siblings, and cousins, and of course requesting the finest ones from my parents and ol' St. Nick. I thought making things simple and direct for everyone would give me the best shot at yielding the greatest number of "keeper" gifts. Of course, this did not always turn out the way I imagined.
The let-down that I feel the worst about even to this day, although for a completely different reason than I had at the time, is the infamous year of the rock tumbler. I may have blogged about this, or any of the following gifts, before so forgive me if you've already heard this. One year, when I was hopefully much younger than 10 or so, I found a very cute red plastic rock tumbler in the JC Penney's catalog. I didn't know anything about polishing rocks, and I had never really had an interest in rock collecting before, but the photo of the tumbler was so cute and the kids in the catalog looked enraptured by the thing. So I put it at the top of my list: this is What I Wanted! On Christmas morning that year, I ran out to the tree, ready to collect my compact, shiny red rock polisher, only to find a huge monstrosity under the decorated branches. There was some sort of humongous, industrial machine under the tree that looked like a cross between a war cannon and a car engine. What in the heck was that I wondered? Well, shortly I was to receive the answer: it was my rock tumbler! Apparently, many other children were just as fascinated by the trendy device they had seen in the pages of the winter catalog, and JC Penney's had sold out of them before my parents had a chance to order mine! My father knew I had my heart set on it, so he somehow managed to drive all over western Kansas to find a rock polisher and the only one available was an actual, professional model that some guy made himself. This was for heavy duty, serious rock polishing! The guy who made it sold my dad a bunch of packets of the powder that you were supposed to put in the tumbler to polish the rocks down. Well, this was NOT What I Wanted and I threw a huge temper tantrum to demonstrate my disappointment. I live life with few regrets, but that moment is one of the few. My dad made such an effort to make my Christmas perfect that year, spending way more time and money on something that not only did I not appreciate, but openly scorned! I wish I had just been able to man up and pretend that I liked it, at the very least, but what I really wish is that I could have seen how much my father tried to deliver the perfect gift and I would have recognized that it was actually much better than the silly toy I had asked for. Instead, the rock polisher was doomed to sit in a corner of my bedroom, never to be used for it's intended purpose.
Another time I was horribly rude to someone for buying me a gift other than the one I wanted was in junior high when my girlfriend Maria and I exchanged presents. As usual, I had been extremely specific: I wanted "This Time: The First Four Years" by the Culture Club on vinyl. It had all their hits and a song I'd never heard before! I don't even remember what I bought her, but when she handed me my gift, a 12"x12" flat square all wrapped up, I was so happy; only to rip open the package and discover... "Out of Our Hands" by Pablo Cruise. Who the? What the? Not only was it the wrong record, it was something I'd never even HEARD of! What was with the stupid kid-like handprints all over it? Did she add those herself, I wondered? Oh, I was so mad. Visible shaken, Maria apologized and had a very long story of what exactly happened, but in the end it came down to the fact that this record was only $1, and that was really all she could afford. She wanted to get me the right record, but it was too much money, and she thought maybe as long as she got me a record it would at least be partially acceptable. I hope I wasn't too hard on her. But really, when your junior high boyfriend demands a Culture Club album for Christmas, maybe you suspect that there are larger issues looming...
Lastly, here's one that I don't really remember at all other than from the home video which unfortunately survives to this day. I wasn't disappointed with the actual gift itself, because it had been exactly what I asked for: The Mickey Mouse Clubhouse (I looked for a photo online but couldn't find one). It was a vinyl tent with a frame made out of plastic poles. When assembled, it looked like a cute little house for kids to play in. I ended up loving the present and had it set up in my room for quite awhile. But, when I first took it out of the packaging, I was very distraught and exclaimed, "I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GONNA BE ALL WINKLED!" (Wrinkled) It's a hilarious video of a bratty little kid upset that things weren't the perfect way he had imagined them. Later in the video, I steal my sister's stuffed My Little Pony to play with as my own!
Have you ever gotten a rotten gift? Given a clunker to a loved one? Tell me your stories in the comments section!
Comments
I have to say, I don't remember disappointment associated with receiving a gift...but I can understand it!
Let's hear more!